So I decided; to help me post multiple times weekly, I dedicate my Thursday posts to #ThrowitbackThursday ! Due to recently discovering the niche of Off White, I felt this was the most appropriate hashtag I could find. And considering the newly found identity, today’s subject is very fitting.
This Thursday we’ll be throwing it back to my sex ed class during my freshman year of high school. I remember the teacher- who if I’m not mistaken, was a female body builder that went tanning way too much and was sleeping with her personal trainer- constantly preached abstinence to my class as if having sex would ultimately lead to pregnancy every time. At the time, I don’t think she realized her rants would’ve been more effective had she been preaching safe sex rather than no sex. I also remember that in a class of about twenty three-year-old’s, only I and a handful of other people could claim we were “practicing abstinence”.
During class work time, I would often eavesdrop on my teacher and the student aid as they discussed their personal lives. I will openly admit, I do not feel bad for eavesdropping; she always put me with Spanish-speaking only students to help them with their class work despite the fact that I didn’t even speak Spanish and the whole purpose of the student aid was to help these students, not help her figure out why her personal trainer would smash and not spend the night. If I could’ve contributed to the conversation, I would’ve suggested that she consider the appeal of cuddling with a crocodile so she could see things from his point of view.
Looking back on this class, I realize that sex ed classes in high school are pointless. I feel as though I never actually learned about STDs in the realistic sense that you could walk around for weeks and never even know you have one — we really just saw the pictures of extreme cases when things were pus-filled and discolored. Yeah, they scared me at the time but not only did they not keep me from having sex, they also gave me an unrealistic view of STDs in general. While my teacher had gone on and on about refraining from sex until marriage, she never actually prepared us for the premarital sex 46% of us were going to have. Yes, we were told to use condoms a handful of times, but we weren’t told about other birth control options, or getting tested regularly, or even the long-term effects of certain diseases such as infertility and a negative self perception.
Another issue with the class is that no one warned us about the emotional effects of sex. We learned we could get diseases, get pregnant, get raped, but not about how we could get attached, get hurt, or get addicted. It’s understandable because every situation is different but a warning would’ve been appreciated. We learned what to do if we found ourselves in abusive relationships however we never learned the warning signs of entering an abusive relationships. We learned that douching is an option based on personal preference but no one confirmed that the shaving of pubes was simply a societal preference. I just feel like if there’s one classroom subject that should realistically prepare me for life and not be simply black or white, its sex ed.
We heard condoms are crucial and discovered pulling out is possible, but never learned if precum could get a girl pregnant or not. My teacher took the wrong approach; she simply told us not to do it and left it at that. I can think of the perfect analogy for this scenario ; she basically told us not to touch the hot stove, and withheld the information we’d need when we burnt our fingers out of curiosity.
Can you remember your first sex ed class or “talk” with your parents or guardians? Feel free to leave them in a comment below !
Until next time,